What I eat, apparently

At entirely too many restaurants, a serving is defined as the average amount of food eaten in the average meal of a 6 1/2 foot person who weighs 300 lbs (give or take a few lbs). For those who are shorter and smaller, this means a much larger then average meal by far. And it’s unfortunate for those of us that grew up with ‘eat everything on your plate’ ideas pounded into us. At least, I know I spent a large portion of my life, when in restaurants, in eating to the point of being rather physically uncomfortable, because I just thought that’s how things worked.

Luckily, at some point in all those years my brain took over. Now, part of the joy at eating out at places with portions of eating contest proportions is the fact that you’ll get two meals out of it instead of just one.

For example, take this here cheesesteak, which this rooster lustfully gazes upon. It is indeed the remnant cheesesteak of an earlier meal.

Once upon a time, there were about 3 more inches at the end of that cheesesteak. That, plus eating all of the fries, plus a bonus slice of pizza that came my way, made for a quite filling meal, with this quite large cheesesteak remnant for dinner later on.

The only downside of eating your meals this way, though, is the strategy involved can lead to a bit of an imbalance. See, this cheesesteak came with a quite large serving of fries. Reheated fries are disgusting more often then not, so as far as I was concerned, it was a given that all of the fries would need to be eaten the first go-around. This, of course, left less room for the cheesesteak, which is what I really wanted in the first place. But, such are the sacrifices one must make for efficiency!

So there’s this barbecue place vaguely near where I live that I’ve been dying to eat at for a few years now, called Buz and Ned’s. I’ll do that you see, I’ll have places that I’ll decide to eat at and it will take me years to eat there, all for various reasons. I’m a slave to coupons, so often this inconveniences me. If the food served there is rather unhealthy, it’s likely I’ll never get there in winter, as I always feel like a giant bloated sponge all winter long due to being to cold to move, and therefore, exercise. Really, the only thing I *am* good at in wintertime is eating Christmas cookies. Thus, the sponge.

Anyhow, Drew and myself made it over to Buz and Neds, he got a bbq chicken sandwich and I got the pork sandwich. Simply delightful.

I actually liked the chicken sandwich more then the pork sandwich, but this had to do with it having a bit more sauce then anything else. The sauce was excellent, sweet and barbecuey and just what I look for in a bbq sandwich.

Incidentally, the person at the register asked me if I wanted cole slaw and/or hot sauce on it. I declined for both. This is because a.) I am a wuss and can only handle but so much spice and b.) cole slaw is disgusting. I would even be able to give you scientific proof that cole slaw is disgusting if it weren’t for the fact that scientists are too grossed out by it to get close enough to gather the data necessary to prove said disgustingness. Cole Slaw is the Slaw of the Devil.

Also, their brownies are absolutely delightful. We didn’t get to try any sides, as one’s stomach can hold but so much.

I heart barbeque, it is so gooey and delicious. This is not real barbecue, it is merely chicken doused with barbeque sauce and inserted into a sandwich-like item, but it was still quite delish.

I’d like to point out that there is indeed avocado in that sandwich. Avocado and barbecue, as well as avocado and most sandwiches, go delightfully together. I would also like to mention that pumpernickel is the Bread of the Gods.

I will be passing through barbecue central soon, and by this I mean the Carolinas, as I head off to Myrtle Beach for the weekend. Have no fear, I’ll be back soon enough on Tuesday, more likely then not laden with pictures of more tasties.

I have this problem, where I make a thing of meat or pasta or something similar, and I never put in enough ingredients. When I use a recipe, this generally isn’t a problem, but it’s not often I follow recipes (when cooking, at least). I hate having to wash 837482073 measuring cups, and I like to get all frothy and dump in random crap. This does result, on occasion, with food that is blander then it should be, as what would be a large chunk of (insert seasoning of your choice here) to sprinkle on top of a single serving is just barely anything when poured over a large pot or pan of something.

So I dumped in lots of crap this time.

First, the lamb. I shredded up some onion, then some cilantro that was just dying to be used up, then dumped in a vast quantity of garlic, an almost-but-not-quite-as-vast quantity of cumin, some coriander, cinnamon, red pepper, black pepper, and possibly something else I’ve since blocked out. Fried it up, then dumped it on a toasted bun. Onto this I dumped my own concoction of tzatziki sauce (yogurt, lemon, garlic, cucumber), some feta, lettuce and tomato, and the result was this:

In making this, I delicately placed the meat on, strategically slathered the sauce, painstakingly placed the tomato, and lightly layered the lettuce, so that everything stayed there and the sandwich was about 3 feet high, give or take a foot. Then, I squashed it down with my hand, cut it, and took the picture above. As I began to eat, pretty much every single ingredient attempted to crawl onto my hand and fall down on the plate. Lucky for me, only about 30% of them succeeded. Pure deliciousness! And, with the vast amounts of seasoning added, it ended up tasting seasoned rather then like Death Sheep In My Mouth. This is a good thing.