What I eat, apparently

The only thing better then chocolate is chocolate with chocolate. The only thing better then chocolate with chocolate is chocolate with chocolate and chocolate. The only thing better then chocolate with chocolate and chocolate is — Wait. This has the grand potential of becoming mindnumbing and repetitive. Or, as I prefer to say, repetetetitititive. It’s a word much more expressive of it’s real meaning. Kind of like how monotony should be pronounced with the same emphasis on each syllable.

So, if we assume that, instead of logic and numbers, the world was actually comprised of stomachs and chocolate, then this would totally be functional:

$chocolate = chocolate; //This is totally a number. The chocolate number!
$moarchocolate = $chocolate;

for ($i = 1; $i <= stomachBloat(); $i++){
	$moarchocolate++;
	print 'The only thing better then ' . $chocolate . ' is '
. $moarchocolate . '.';
	$chocolate++;
}

This is the sort of bad php that most people have a hard time stomaching, but I find it quite appetizing! And to those whose brains have yet to fall out, I give thee this:

This is about 4 iterations or so into that aforementioned chocolate loop. Chocolate pie crust, plus chocolate pudding, plus chocolate whipped cream, plus chocolate ice cream (containing chocolate brownie chunks), topped with chocolate sauce. Thank Drew for this baby. Quite delightful, indeed!

I actually have a really hard time making salads. The big problem is the dressing, I suppose. The store dressings I’d get never tasted as good as restaurant dressings. Also, I had a bad habit of buying ranch dressing and continuing to use it for long after the expiration date, whereupon it gets a weird tangy flavor. I was young and innocent in those days, and assumed that salad dressing had the shelf life of any other condiment. Ranch, in particular, has a bad habit of pooping out on you entirely too early, due to it’s large dairy presence.

I also had a Caesar salad phase, and it is practically impossible to buy Caesar dressing from the store and have it taste anything close to good. For me, at least. This is all possibly because I was(am) a cheap bastard and generally avoided anything higher then Kraft-quality, due to the price tag.

Then along came Ken’s Steak House honey mustard dressing. It is a glorious thing indeed.

And also, I should mention, along came Drew, equipped with the Tripps Restaurant gained knowledge of how to make a decent salad. And thusly, we have this baby, which he even made all artful for me:

It uses romaine lettuce, tomato, croutons, sliced almonds, tortilla bits, parmesan cheese, american cheese, and the aforementioned honey mustard dressing. Yay!