I am a Deviled Egg Nazi (though I prefer to think of it as ‘Purist’)

I’m very picky when it comes to eggs. I know they’re good for me, in small quantities at least, but the majority of egg-related items that consist mostly of egg are items that I find rather difficult to stomach. For example, the mere scent of an omelet will make my stomach turn, especially if liver is involved in any way. I prefer my eggs to be couched in something more appetizing, such as cake. Or cookies. Or french toast, for that matter. Also, for reasons beyond me, I’m a bit more forgiving when it some to Asian dishes involving egg. Egg belongs in fried rice, I’ll happily consume egg drop soup, and (assuming that enough sugar is added) I even enjoy tamago sushi. It’s the breakfast-type eggs that I have difficulty with, including the aforementioned omelets and pretty much any scrambled egg, or any fried egg where I can’t efficiently separate the repulsive yolk from the much more appetizing white.

Deviled eggs are different, though. There’s something magical about mustard, in the way it transforms an otherwise disgusting yolk into something delicious and delightful. The ideal deviled eggs involve the mashed yolk, a generous portion of mustard, and a dollop of Miracle Whip (mayo will also do, but I prefer Miracle Whip as it’s a wee bit more zingy). However, I am completely a purist in that I really hate anything ‘chunky’ added to my deviled eggs.

There are some who think that pickles/relish belong in deviled eggs. There are even some who will make room for ham or bacon in their eggs. I say that this is all blasphemy. The Egg Gods frown down upon these people. Deviled eggs are designed to be smooth, creamy, and tangy. The Egg Gods also get quite miffed when there is not sufficient mustard added to the filling. A deviled egg lacking in tang is as sad little egg, indeed.

deviled eggs

One thing I find quite interesting about the whole deviled egg process is the addition of the paprika. Said sprinkling was rather sloppy for this particular instance of deviled eggs, thus the paprika glob on the right. Paprika, in general, is one of those seasonings that I’m just not sure what to do with. Pretty much the only time I ever use it is when making deviled eggs. Yet, deviled eggs seem naked without it. ‘Naked’ might be too strong of a word. Rather, deviled eggs without paprika seem as if they’re wearing skimpy lingerie, but in that bad way, like you feel really bad for them because they’re really cold. And you’re actually super conservative and would find them to be much more attractive if they were wearing a demure evening gown made of paprika. Just like that!

And thusly I shall dub it – Paprika: The Evening Gown of the Seasoning World.

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One Comment

  1. Egg Beater January 27, 2009 11:38 pm

    Deviled eggs are the spawn Satan.